First Crush
by Andrew Joshua Talon
Summary: Stephanie reacts a little differently to Damian's taunting. R&R please.
1. Chapter 1

_First Crush_

A Batman One-shot by Andrew J. Talon

_Disclaimer:_ No I don't own Batman, and no I'm not writing this for money. But of course, in the very unlikely event that someone from DC spots this and offers me a job, I'm certainly not going to say no.

* * *

"Do you stuff your uniform?" Damian sniped. "Fatgirl?"

Tim scowled deeply. Damian was grating, especially when he was insulting Stephanie. Sure, they weren't together but it was... It was the principle of the thing! Their bickering was getting on his nerves too, but he waited for Stephanie's inevitable return salvo.

But it never came. Stephanie just smiled. Rising from her chair, she walked across the Batcave floor to Damian. She reached up, and slowly, teasingly lowered the zipper on the front of her uniform, revealing the swell of her breasts. The scorn vanished from Damian's face and he stared, cheeks turning bright red.

"Do these look stuffed to you, brat?" She asked in a breathy, sexy voice, pushing her boobs up with her arms. Damian, normally unruffled by genocidal clowns or large numbers of heavily armed thugs, actually stuttered at this sight.

"I-I-I-"

Stephanie chuckled, and bent over to kiss his forehead. "So you are just a kid after all," she said with a smirk. She turned and headed for the costume vault. Damian stared after her, bewildered and blushing bright red.

Dick and Barbara managed to restrain their laughter. For about five seconds. Tim laughed too, but mainly to cover up that niggling bit of jealousy. It was ridiculous, really.

What chance did Damian have with Stephanie? And they weren't even dating. It was silly. He had Tamara, and bigger things to worry about. He wasn't a teenager anymore, he was an adult. He could deal with this.

... He was _still_ blushing and staring after her. What was his _deal?_

* * *

_"Mother?"_

Talia looked up and smiled at the screen from her compound in Uzbekistan. "Damian. It's nice of you to call me. How are you?"

_"Protecting the city goes well,"_ Damian said with his usual confidence. _"Grayson is a better teacher than I gave him credit for. Drake is pathetic and should be cast aside like a used dishrag. Pennyworth is... Admirable,"_ Damian managed. _"And Stephanie-"_

"Stephanie?" Talia asked, arching an elegant eyebrow. Damian flustered.

_"I meant to say, 'Brown.' Stephanie Brown. The Batgirl."_

"You haven't mentioned her before," Talia mused. "I thought she was dead."

_"She wasn't. She isn't. She's the new Batgirl. At first I thought she was weak and useless-Her stance is weak, her breathing is inadequate, she makes as much noise as a drunken elephant..._" Damian went into a lengthy diatribe about Stephanie, over the course of which Talia's smile grew.

_"... And she-She actually teased me with her... Her..."_

"Breasts, Damian?" Talia asked. Damian flushed.

_"Yes. Those."_

"She sounds like an... Interesting young woman," Talia mused.

_"She... Is... Sort of... Somewhat,"_ Damian said.

"Well, why don't you take her to dinner?" Talia suggested. "Get to know her? I'm sure Alfred can help you with all the arrangements."

_"Dinner?"_ Damian asked.

"Yes. Also known as a date. Ask her on a date, my son," Talia encouraged.

_"But-But-!"_

"After all, she is... Interesting, is she not?" Talia said with an impish smile. Damian blushed, but managed to nod.

_"Yes..."_

"Well then, get to know her better. And then, if she proves interesting enough, make her your bride. It's very simple," Talia said.

Damian nodded. _"Yes mother."_

"Have a good night, Damian. I love you," Talia said.

Damian muttered he loved her too, and cut the transmission. Talia hummed and smiled thoughtfully.

Perhaps it was time to visit her Beloved's city again... And see about this young woman her son was interested in.

* * *

_One shot, unless you guys want more. And yeah I know Damian's first crush in the comics was Katana but Second Crush isn't as good a title. R&R please._


	2. Chapter 2

_First Crush_

A Batman One-shot by Andrew J. Talon

_Disclaimer:_ No I don't own Batman, and no I'm not writing this for money. But of course, in the very unlikely event that someone from DC spots this and offers me a job, I'm certainly not going to say no.

* * *

None of Damian's training with the League of Assassins had prepared him for any sort of "wooing", and frankly Damian was at a loss of how to do it. His school interactions offered little help-He found the girls there to be annoying. Well, Stephanie could be annoying too but she was... Nice, and... Bouncy. That made her far less annoying.

Bouncy... Bouncy...

"GAH!"

Damian was looking up at the roof of the cave, feeling dazed. Dick's face appeared in his vision overhead.

"Having trouble focusing, Damian?" He asked with a grin. Damian glowered and got back up to his feet, reassuming a fighting stance. Dick stared at him for a second.

"You want to tell me what's going on?"

"No."

Dick smirked a little, and reassumed his own fighting stance. "Okay..." He threw a series of punches and kicks, nothing Damian couldn't handle. Damian's instincts took over, guiding his movements to block, deflect and counter the strikes.

"So, how's Stephanie?" Dick asked. Damian fumbled a bit with a block, but managed to recover with a quick high kick directed at Dick's chest. Dick blocked and Damian withdrew just for a second, before launching a furious Shaolin combo designed to break through Dick's defense.

"I wouldn't know," Damian said. "I don't watch her."

"You've been reading her file though," Dick said. Damian fumbled again, a punch that should have hit Dick's side going astray enough to Dick to capture his wrist. Damian grunted and launched a snap kick at Dick's side, forcing the first Boy Wonder to release him.

"So? I read through LOTS of files," Damian retorted, dropping into a leg sweep. Dick jumped over it and Damian rolled back up to his feet to evade the stomp Dick was about to lay all over his face.

"Yes, but I don't think thoughts regarding proper crime scene procedure would distract you so much," Dick said, switching to Jeet Kun Do to smack away Damian's counter-offensive.

"I am _not_ distracted!" Damian growled. Dick ducked Damian's next kick and smirked.

"Stephanie's boobs," he said. Damian's cheek flashed red and his reaction time was delayed by just a moment. At their level, it was all it took for Dick to kick Damian in the gut and send him sprawling.

"Oof!"

"I think that's pretty conclusive," Dick said. He extended a hand to Damian, who resentfully took it and allowed himself to be pulled up to his feet. They headed over to a small folding table set up near the training area, where bottles of cool water and fresh towels waited. Damian was still amazed that Alfred could place all this without being noticed. Clearly the old man had some tricks of his own, though when he'd asked to study with him Alfred had seemed somewhat offended.

"Now look Damian," Dick began after drinking down some water, "what you're feeling is perfectly normal-"

"I know."

"Okay, and it happens to all boys your-"

"I know. What I want to know is..." Damian paused a second, simply to collect his thoughts really, "how do I... Woo her?"

"Woo?" Dick asked. Damian nodded. The current Batman chuckled a bit. "Woo huh?"

"Yes! How?" Damian demanded.

"You know Damian, you are... Well... Kind of young for her-"

"Not much younger than you were when you began to date Gordon," Damian replied. Dick nodded.

"Good point."

"And despite Pennyworth's assertions you are an idiot when it comes to women-"

"He is _so_ forfeiting a raise for that," Dick muttered.

"-given the number of relationships you have been involved in..." Damian paused, again as though to collect his thoughts. Dick blinked, and put it together. He let out a short bark of laughter.

"You want to ask _me_ for... Wooing advice?"

Damian slowly nodded. Dick laughed again, and Damian's scowl grew.

"It's not funny!"

"No, no... But... Well, you know Damian, it's just..." Dick shook his head and ruffled Damian's hair. "It's complicated."

"Shut up! Stop that!" Damian growled, swatting Dick's hand away. "Do you have any useful advice for me or not?"

Dick chuckled. "Well... Normally the first thing I'd tell you to be is confident, but you're a special case."

"Very," Damian said.

"So here's what you do..."

* * *

_ This can't possibly end any way other than well, right?. R&R please._


	3. Chapter 3

_First Crush_

A Batman One-shot by Andrew J. Talon

_Disclaimer:_ No I don't own Batman, and no I'm not writing this for money. But of course, in the very unlikely event that someone from DC spots this and offers me a job, I'm certainly not going to say no.

* * *

"Come on! I've been pulling double duty because Tim's got his manties in a twist. I am overworked!" Stephanie loudly protested in the Bat Cave later that evening. Like Dick and Damian, she was in full costume. "Can't you pull in someone else to cover my shift?"

"Stephanie, you know that without Cass we've all been having to pull extra hours," Dick calmly reminded her. Stephanie nodded.

"I know, and I've been willing to do that! But I do have my limits. Couldn't we pull in Supergirl for one night to cover?"

Dick slowly shook his head. "Sorry Steph, we can't. We need you..." He glanced over at Damian and back at Steph. "However, you don't have to go it alone."

"Oh?" Stephanie asked, raising an eyebrow.

Damian continued his preparation, tightening his belt and ensuring his sword was attached. He had already done all of that, of course, but he could double or triple his checks as needed.

"Damian will be with you. I will be taking the East end of the city, you guys focus on your standard patrol route," Dick said. "I think it should make things a little easier, crime seems to be at a relatively low level on our patrol route."

"All right," Stephanie agreed after a moment's thought. She looked over at Damian. "All right kiddo, ready to do this?"

"Yes," Damian said. He rummaged through his utility belt, as though looking for something he had misplaced. This of course was impossible, he had memorized where everything was long ago, but according to Grayson it helped to show a bit of theatrics when presenting a gift. He pulled out the gift and handed it to Stephanie. Stephanie blinked at the box.

"What is this?"

"Open it," Damien ordered. Stephanie did so, and pulled out a well crafted knife. She raised an eyebrow.

"I believe you need a knife. Better to have a spare blade rather than have to rely entirely on batarangs," Damian said in a very business-like tone. Stephanie examined it, including the purple handle with an ergonomic grip. She smiled.

"Er... Thanks," she said. Damien nodded and turned to head to the Batmobile.

"Shall we?" He asked.

"Right..." She looked questioningly over at Dick, who just shrugged. Damian jumped into the driver's seat and started it up. Stephanie slid into the side seat and strapped in. The cockpit closed up and the Batmobile started on it's way towards the exit.

The two sat in silence, Stephanie turning the knife around in her hands.

"Would you like to listen to music?" Damian asked. Stephanie blinked and looked over at Damian.

"Sure?"

Damian switched the radio on to something by Mozart. He continued driving, eyes firmly ahead on the road. Stephanie continued staring, looking back at him and at the road ahead. Frankly, she had the feeling something was up.

"There a problem?" Stephanie asked.

"No. No problem," Damian said quickly, "why would there be a problem? There isn't a problem."

"Okay, now I _know_something is up," Stephanie said flatly. "Look, if it's about me teasing you before, I am sorry if it upset you."

Damian's cheeks turned bright red. "No. It did not upset me. Tell me about your childhood."

At the abrupt subject gear shift, Stephanie gawked.

"What?"

"Tell me about your childhood. Interests. Hobbies..." Damian considered it for a while. "Astological sign if you subscribe to beliefs in that."

Stephanie had the sudden mental image of Damian in John Travolta style, sliding across the dance floor with a smile. She felt a laugh bubble out of her mouth, and didn't try to stop it.

"Heeheehee, hahahahaha!"

"What? What's so funny?" Damian demanded.

"You asked me what my _sign_is," Stephanie laughed. "Sorry, sorry, that's just kind of funny..."

"You didn't answer my question," Damian said.

"Why do you want to know?" Stephane asked. Damian growled.

"You can't answer a question with another question!"

"Seems like I just did."

Damian stewed for a moment, before deciding to adjust his plans.

"Very well. I am interested in you."

"What?" Stephanie asked.

"Interested in you. In your backstory, your history, your relationships," Damian said in as business-like a manner as he could manage. Stephanie snickered a bit, then looked out at the windshield as they headed closer to Gotham.

"Well... I grew up with my mother in the suburbs. My father was the Cluemaster, a pretty terrible villain all things considered who was in jail most of my life."

"Uh huh," Damian said, nodding.

"When he came back after being 'rehabilitated', I found out he was returning to crime. I got pretty upset about that."

"Uh huh," Damian said, with precisely the same modulation as before.

Stephanie took a deep breath. "So I decided to try and thwart him by dressing up in a costume of my own."

"Uh huh."

"Then I gained superpowers by being bitten by a radioactive eggplant monster and devoted myself to fighting crime," Stephanie added with a straight face.

Damian blinked. "That didn't hap..." He scowled as Stephanie chuckled.

"Just making sure you were paying attention."

"You grew up with your mother as your father was often in jail, when he returned after being in prison he went back to crime, you dressed up to stop him, you had no original intention of becoming a superhero but did so after meeting Drake and my father," Damian summarized. Stephanie blinked.

"Yeah, that's right."

"I have memorized your biographical information, it's all in the Batcomputer," Damian smoothly said.

"Well, that's... Flattering, in a creepy supergenius child sort of way," Stephanie said dryly. "So if you've memorized it-"

"I want to hear it from you," Damian said. Stephanie blinked several times in rapid succession, before shaking her head. She mentally shrugged.

"All right... I guess you could say my first adventure was when..."

* * *

Thoughout the patrol, Damian and Stephanie would get out of the car, deal with some trouble, and return to it. Each time, Stephanie would relate a bit more of her backstory, and Damian would continue to nod like a bobble head doll. Frankly she was becoming a bit weirded out, but at the same time she kind of enjoyed just being able to talk about all this.

"... So then I died... Well, not really. You know, that Doctor always kind of creeped me out. Never could put my finger on exactly why that was."

"Yes, it seemed like an extremely out of character thing for her to do," Damian concurred. "It was the prelude to an enormous amount of upheaval all across the superhero community. It is still difficult to determine the specific cause. My father suspected something much bigger at work."

"What, like some vast intergalactic conspiracy?" Stephanie joked. Damian nodded.

"Yes, actually."

"Ah... Right. Forgot who I was talking about," Stephanie said with a sigh. "You know, despite everything I do miss him. I think he was right to fire me after everything I did."

"He was," Damian said. He looked over at Stephanie. "However, your performance since then has been... Adequate."

"Well... Thanks for your ringing endorsement," Stephanie said with a smile. Damian nodded as they turned a corner. Stephanie felt her stomach rumble and she grimaced.

"Urgh... Dinner time already?"

"I have taken care of it," Damian said. He switched the Batmobile into autopilot mode and hit another button. Two tray tables emerged with food in containers. "I had Alfred make these for us."

"Oh yes!" Stephanie grinned as she opened her food up. She began eating it eagerly. Damian ate his food as well. Soon both their meals were finished, and the trays slipped back into the car's walls.

"I take it Alfred had some input on the design of this Batmobile?" Stephanie asked, wiping her mouth with a napkin. Damian nodded.

"Yes."

"Well that's wonderful," Stephanie sighed. She poked her hip. "Though too much of this and I might not fit into my costume."

"That wouldn't be a bad thing," Damian said. Stephanie blinked.

"Oh yeah?" Stephanie asked. Damian coughed and looked out the window.

"Yes."

"Aw, Damian's finally discovering his hormones," Stephanie cooed. She reached out and pulled him into a hug and noogied him.

"Hey! Ack! Get off!" Damian gasped. Stephanie snickered.

"Isn't that just so _cute_!" She finally let go of him, laughing a bit at his red cheeks. Damian, however, rather than fighting back, turned to look at her.

"Cute enough to go out with?"

Stephanie blinked.

"Hwah?"

"Out... To a movie... Dinner... Like this, but not on patrol," Damian explained, trying to sound gruff but coming off as nervous all the same. Stephanie shook her head and chuckled.

"Are you asking me out on a _date?_"

"Yes," Damian said.

"Well... That's really cute, but maybe another time," Stephanie said with a gentle smile. Damian scowled.

"Like when?"

Stephanie rubbed the top of his head with another soft laugh. "I don't know, maybe in a few years?"

"... Oh," Damian said flatly. Stephanie shrugged.

"Sorry."

"... Right," Damian said.

The rest of the patrol was conducted with just the slightest bit of awkwardness between them, but nothing serious came up and soon enough they were pulling back into the Batcave.

Damian hopped out, as did Stephanie. Stephanie gave him a little wave as she headed to the costume vault to change, leaving Damian standing there alone.

"Everything all right, Master Damian?" Alfred asked.

"Fine," Damian grunted. Alfred shook his head and rested a hand on his shoulder.

"Every young boy must have a bit of heartbreak now and then. It is the nature of life, I'm afraid," the butler consoled. Damian's eyes narrowed.

"Where's Dick?"

"In the gymnasium," Alfred said. Damian nodded and ran off, leaving the butler behind to shake his head with a chuckle.

"Of course... To some, it's just a challenge," he murmured to himself.

* * *

Dick was unwinding after his patrol with a series of acrobatics, an old routine he'd practiced since his first days at the circus. It wasn't hard for him to interrupt it though as he saw Damian enter the gymnasium part of the cave gloomier than usual.

"I take it, it didn't go well?" Dick asked as he landed on a mat nearby. Damian snorted, drew his sword, and began running through some katas.

"She said she might date me in a few years," Damian huffed. Dick nodded.

"Ouch. Yeah, that's what Barb told me too, first time I asked her out," he said.

"So now what do I do?" Damian asked.

"Well, it's not the end of the world," Dick said. Damian shook his head.

"No, but I did something wrong. I wish to try again."

"Careful Damian, women don't like men who are pushy," Dick advised. Damian shook his head.

"If my age was eliminated as a factor, she would date me. Therefore, I need to attempt something to offset this imbalance. It is simple logic. So, what should I do now?"

Dick sighed. _Well... It's not like he'll turn into some crazed fanboy..._ He smirked. _And it might be fun in the long run as long as it doesn't get too out of hand..._

"Well... If my advice is insufficient, you could always ask someone else," Dick suggested.

"Oh? And who can I ask?"

"Well, you could give Jason a call," Dick suggested with a small smile. "He did go on a date with Barb once himself."

Damian hummed. He then shrugged.

"I shall inquire of him then, Grayson. Good night," Damian said. He headed off, leaving Dick shaking his head.

"If nothing else... I get to make Jason miserable for a while." He chuckled and headed back to the bars to resume his routine, never suspecting just what kind of chaos he might have unleashed.

If he had known... Well, he would have probably done it anyway.

* * *

_At the request of the wonderfully talented gabzillaz, I have decided to write more of this story up. Sorry this part is a bit slow, it's more of a set up chapter._


End file.
